This chapter pushes back against the idea that the only truly meaningful singleness is the kind that is intentionally chosen. It questions a growing language shift—from “singleness” to “celibacy”—that subtly recasts one kind of unmarried life as nobler, holier, and more kingdom-focused than others.
This hits me in a very particular way right now. It’s not been long since my divorce, and my heart and mind are not remotely ready to look at remarriage. Not to mention that I haven’t figured out where I stand in the question of if God intends remarriage after divorce to be a choice at all! There are still many emotions for me to unpack and many questions to pray through, but even so this period of “single again”, wedged uncomfortably between choice and circumstance, has been invaluable in teaching me to trust what the Lord is doing in my life.
I think I have been very fortunate to be in churches (in Australia and in France) where the false virtue of chosen singleness (or marriage) over circumstantial singleness has not been put on a pedestal.
We should frame even involuntary singleness how leadership was once framed for me-even those not appointed as elders should strive toward the qualifications of one. So, even if we aren't appointed to an official position, we still seek those good qualities.
In the same way, there are good things we usually associate with marriage that singles can strive for. The difference is that singleness has different freedoms than marriage, and everyone who can should take advantage of whatever freedom is available to them.
This hits me in a very particular way right now. It’s not been long since my divorce, and my heart and mind are not remotely ready to look at remarriage. Not to mention that I haven’t figured out where I stand in the question of if God intends remarriage after divorce to be a choice at all! There are still many emotions for me to unpack and many questions to pray through, but even so this period of “single again”, wedged uncomfortably between choice and circumstance, has been invaluable in teaching me to trust what the Lord is doing in my life.
I think I have been very fortunate to be in churches (in Australia and in France) where the false virtue of chosen singleness (or marriage) over circumstantial singleness has not been put on a pedestal.
We should frame even involuntary singleness how leadership was once framed for me-even those not appointed as elders should strive toward the qualifications of one. So, even if we aren't appointed to an official position, we still seek those good qualities.
In the same way, there are good things we usually associate with marriage that singles can strive for. The difference is that singleness has different freedoms than marriage, and everyone who can should take advantage of whatever freedom is available to them.