The "Sacrificial" Christian Life? (Part 2)
In my last post (on the question of whether the Christian life—or more specifically the single Christian life—might rightly be described as sacrificial), I concluded that:
At times, Christian singleness can be hard, complex, difficult and saddening. (I write from personal experience.) But it is a good, not a sacrifice. It brings blessing to our’s (and others’) lives, not merely the absence of blessing.
[…]
The world says that not pursuing such desires and dreams comes at a great cost to our personal existential fulfilment. The world says that our own personal actualisation in them must be pursued at all costs. The world says that to forgo these things is nothing less than profoundly genuine self-sacrifice.
But these are the world’s words. Not Scripture’s words.
So what about Scripture’s words, then? After all, Scripture does indeed speak of the sacrificial nature of Christian life. It speaks of the life of discipleship as being one of self-denial, correct?
Psssst. If you haven’t read that last post in full, you really ought to stop, go check it out and come back here. This second post in the series will make a lot more sense if you’ve read the first!
So then… what about Scripture’s words?
If we should not generally refer to Christian singleness and/or celibacy as a self-denying and sacrificial sort of life, then what are we to make of those parts of the Bible which do seem to exhort us to live sacrificially? In what sense might we say “yes” to the question of sacrificial living? And how does that relate to singleness/celibacy?
To answer that question, let’s consider two particular passages. Firstly, Matthew 16:25-26 and then secondly, Romans 12:1-2.
“Let him deny himself…”
Then Jesus told his disciples, “If anyone would come after me, let him deny himself and take up his cross and follow me. For whoever would save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for my sake will find it. For what will it profit a man if he gains the whole world and forfeits his soul? Or what shall a man give in return for his soul?”
Matthew 16:24-26
This is an excerpt from my forthcoming book, The Meaning of Singleness.
The prevailing supposition that (especially “unchosen”) Christian celibacy is inherently costly and honorably self-sacrificial takes Jesus’ exhortation that “if any want to become my followers, let them deny themselves and take up their cross and follow me” (Mt 16:24 NRSV) to involve us denying ourselves the fulfilment of that we most personally desire. As Christy Gambrell has put it:
“Because [on this view] ‘self ’ refers to us and what we want, we add a direct object to ‘deny himself,’ so that it becomes ‘Deny himself . . . things.’ Whether that be material objects or immaterial things such as success, love, or meaningful work, denying the self’s desires is a common misunderstanding of self-denial.”
And it is indeed a misunderstanding. Contrary to the spirit of our age, Jesus’ call to self-denial is not a call to deny our ideologically perceived inner-selves (and the fulfilment it yearns for), but our theologically identified sinful selves (and the rebellion it is innately oriented toward).Jesus’ exhortation follows directly on the heels of his having rebuked Peter for setting his mind on earthly, rather than divine things, and specifically on rejecting the need for Christ to die an atoning death for the sins of humanity in accordance with the Scriptures (Mt 16:23). Jesus then immediately goes on to explicate what it will mean for Peter and his other disciples to truly be his followers, to truly set their mind on divine things. As Jesus calls them to deny themselves, take up their cross and follow him, Gambrell concludes he is “claiming authority. Following Christ means disowning the self and giving allegiance to him instead.”
Such self-denial is not about how much personal cost a disciple is willing to nobly endure because Jesus makes it worth it. Rather, it is about the submission of our imperfect will and fallen desires to the perfect will and authoritative demand of the Son of God on our lives.
The Meaning of Singleness © Danielle Treweek 2022
I love Christy Gambrell’s astute observation about the way we have (mis)taken to read this passage about self-denial. As she notes, we so often and so easily make “deny himself” synonymous with “deny himself things”. This then allows us to speak about how we’ve willingly and nobly sacrificed all those good, lovely, much-longed-for dreams and desires in order to follow Jesus… because, well, he’s worth it.
But that is a misreading of Jesus’ exhortation. Jesus isn’t here calling his disciples to give up (so-called) “good” stuff for his sake. Rather, he’s calling us to deny our sinful, worldly selves. To stop having in mind the things of man (v23) and instead have in mind the things of God. To stop pretending to be masters of our own lives. To instead, “deny ourselves” and “follow him”. To put it another way:
When Jesus took up HIS cross, he did so as an act of sacrifice for us.
When Jesus calls us to take up OUR cross, he sees it as an act of submission to him.
That submission is not located in giving up on “good” stuff we could otherwise have. Rather it is located in our willingness to “deny ourselves”, to disown our worldly, sinful, rebellious selves and instead submit to his authority over us. It’s located in our grace-enabled willingness to say no to sin (i.e., to giving up “the whole world”) in order to say yes to Jesus’s reign and rule in our lives.
Chaste Christian singleness (i.e., saying no to having sex with someone we are not married to; making wise and godly decisions about not marrying someone Scripture says we ought/must not marry) is honourable, dignified and worthy of respect.
But chaste Christian singleness is not a grand act of noble self-denial for Jesus’ sake. It’s in no way a supererogatory act of sacrificial martyrdom.
The “cost” of celibacy, therefore, lies not in the giving up of something which we hold dear to our identity, but in the giving up of sin. Saying no to sex with someone they are not married to can be a hard, painful, and perhaps even excruciating thing for a sinner to do—such is the alluring power of sin. However, if we are to denote such a “giving up” as sacrificial, then we must recognize that the only thing being sacrificed is that which leads to death, to the forfeiture of our lives. Surely the giving up of such a thing is not truly a sacrifice, let alone a noble one?
The embracing of sexual celibacy for anyone who is not currently married is not a call to gallant self-denial. Rather, it is a call to ordinary Christian obedience—to that which is most beneficial for the single person themselves, most loving toward others and most honoring of God.
The Meaning of Singleness © Danielle Treweek 2022
“Present your bodies as a living sacrifice”
I appeal to you therefore, brothers, by the mercies of God, to present your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and acceptable to God, which is your spiritual worship. Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect.
Romans 12:1-2
Any discussion of the sacrificial character of Christian life obviously needs to grapple with this passage, right? Especially if we are talking about singleness, celibacy and sexual holiness! After all, right here we see Paul calling us to ‘present our bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and acceptable to God’.(v1).
But again, we need to make a conscious effort to understand what this passage is saying about “sacrifice”, rather than retroactively reading our own contemporary notions of “sacrifice” into the text.
One of the first things to notice is the reason we are to offer our bodies as living sacrifices—namely, the mercies of God. Whatever it means for us to actually present ourselves as sacrifices (more on that below), it is done in response to God’s mercy, or literally his compassions. Paul has just spent chapters 9-11 expounding the incredible nature of that mercy/compassion in Christ. And so he appeals to his readers to act in response to the compassion God has had upon them. Jesus Christ made the one true, final and ultimate sacrifice for sin (Heb 10:1-14). And so any “sacrifice” we make is in response to that once-for-all sacrifice. Our sacrifice is an act of responsive worship (Rom 12:2) rather than one embedded with any notion of atonement.
So what exactly is this living and bodily sacrificial offering? Well, there are a number of important things to observe:
Present your bodies as a living sacrifice
This presenting/offering language is the same language Paul uses back in Romans 6:13, 19. There he exhorted his readers not to offer “their members” to sin, impurity and lawlessness but instead to ‘present yourselves to God as those who have been brought from death to life’ (v13). Now in 12:1, he returns to that exhortation. Those who have been the recipients of God’s transforming mercy (who have been brought from death to life) are to do nothing less than offer/present themselves to him. Again, like in Mt 16, the dichotomy is between offering ourselves to the world, or God. Following the self, or God. Loving sin, or God.Present your bodies as a living sacrifice
In speaking of “our bodies” here, Paul is speaking of our reality as embodied people. The sacrificial presentation/offering we are to make is, yes, bodily. But as commentator after commentator tell us, Paul is speaking about more than just our mere physicality. He is referring to our whole selves, the entire person. Present yourself as a living sacrifice.Present your bodies as a living sacrifice
I’ll let Christopher Ash do the talking on this. He writes :
“These sacrifices are not of things we possess (such as our money, although there is a place for that, e.g. Phil 4:18) or part of our time or energy, but of ourselves to God. We offer ourselves ‘living’, which may mean ‘as those who have been brought from death to life' (6:13), or just that we go on and on offering the sacrifice as long as we live […] It is not so much that I offer a sacrifice, as that I am to be a sacrifice.”1
So let’s recap what we can know about the nature of this call to sacrificial living:
Our sacrifice is made in response to the one true atoning sacrifice for sins
Our sacrifice is the exact opposite of presenting ourselves to sin, impurity, lawlessness, the world and death.
Our sacrifice involves the entire self as a comprehensive whole
Our sacrifice is not the giving up of particular things, but the sacrifice of our very selves to the God who sacrificed everything for us
So, does this passage provide biblical justification for us to speak specifically of singleness and celibacy as actual “sacrifices” in the Christian life? No, it doesn’t.
That is not what Paul has on view here. Paul is not exhorting his readers to give up “good” things (whether they truly be good or we just perceive them to be that) because Jesus offers us something better. Rather, Paul is appealing for his readers to offer their whole selves, their whole lives, everything they are to God as their act of sacrificial worship in response to his compassion and mercy. What is on view is the sacrifice of one’s whole self—our totality—to God as a consistently ongoing act of grace-enabled worship. It’s not about giving up certain things that we like, desire, or long for. Why? Well because:
”It’s not so much that I offer a sacrifice, as that I am to BE a sacrifice.”2
Singleness & Sacrifice
Yes, my singleness (and my sexual abstinence in it) is an objective good, in and of itself.
Yes, my singleness (and my sexual abstinence in it) is something that ought to be honoured by the body of Christ.
Yes, my singleness (and my sexual abstinence in it) has immense dignity, value and significance in God’s sight
And yes, my singleness (and my sexual abstinence in it) is certainly part and parcel of what it means for me right here, right now to live day in/day out as one who offers herself as a living sacrifice, holy and acceptable to God as my spiritual act of worship.
But by remaining single (rather than marrying someone I ought not) and remaining sexually abstinent (rather than having sex within someone I am not rightly married to), I am not engaging in an act of noble self-sacrifice or costly self-denial. I’m simply being godly. And even then, that godliness is not of my own making or my own doing.
For by grace you have been saved through faith. And this is not your own doing; it is the gift of God, not a result of works, so that no one may boast. For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them.
Ephesians 2:8-10
Christopher Ash, Teaching Romans: Volume Two. Proclamation Trust Media, 2009, 153-54.
Ash, Teaching Romans, 154.