I value how clearly you’ve described the “trap” here—both the old and the new. The “gifting” paradigm holds dangers even for those who, like me, happen to fit pretty neatly into the Protestant conception of someone “equipped for lifelong singleness.” My personal experiences with sexual/relational desire and temptation have been minimal, …
I value how clearly you’ve described the “trap” here—both the old and the new. The “gifting” paradigm holds dangers even for those who, like me, happen to fit pretty neatly into the Protestant conception of someone “equipped for lifelong singleness.” My personal experiences with sexual/relational desire and temptation have been minimal, and I feel great contentment so long as I have friends. Nonetheless, I still was anxious in my early 20s because I inferred that if I began to have any “temptation issues,” I would be basically *required* to pursue marriage, even if there were no suitable suitors or if I still had other senses of vocation that contradicted a call to marriage.
Something always seemed off about basing my understanding of my calling mainly on how I was or wasn’t tempted, or basing it generally on my *feelings*, but I couldn’t articulate it at that point. Your work has been tremendously helpful in untangling this problem.
I value how clearly you’ve described the “trap” here—both the old and the new. The “gifting” paradigm holds dangers even for those who, like me, happen to fit pretty neatly into the Protestant conception of someone “equipped for lifelong singleness.” My personal experiences with sexual/relational desire and temptation have been minimal, and I feel great contentment so long as I have friends. Nonetheless, I still was anxious in my early 20s because I inferred that if I began to have any “temptation issues,” I would be basically *required* to pursue marriage, even if there were no suitable suitors or if I still had other senses of vocation that contradicted a call to marriage.
Something always seemed off about basing my understanding of my calling mainly on how I was or wasn’t tempted, or basing it generally on my *feelings*, but I couldn’t articulate it at that point. Your work has been tremendously helpful in untangling this problem.